I can't find a routine.

Before quitting my language institute job, I daydreamed about how I would spend my newfound free time. I will go to yoga and Skype with my family. I will blog regularly and plan my meals. I will clean frequently and pick up writing again. I will be a über productive, creative machine.

None of that has happened.

During my three week vacation, I accomplished very little. I had all these lofty goals for what I could get done but spent most of those weeks simply enjoying all the freedom. I went from a 70 hour work week to a 0 hour work week and couldn't get enough of doing nothing. Then I felt frustrated by what I perceived as lost time but was comforted by my dads' words that sometimes "it takes a while to be creative again."

I'm back to working and am just now beginning to sort out my normal work week routine. Slowly, very slowly, it feels like I am developing a normal pace of life. Balanced between my job and caring for my apartment, my writing and myself, I can see a glimmer of the "normal" post-grad life I have been seeking since graduating well over a year ago.

The only surprisingly, not very "normal" thing about it is that I happen to be doing all this in Lima, Peru. I sure didn't see that one coming while I was waiting to walk across the stage. But I have learned that normalcy fluctuates and this is where I am. Honestly, I couldn't be happier about my space in this little corner of the world.

1 comment:

Samantha Bangayan said...

What IS "normalcy" anyway? =P I completely relate, Meghan! I've always been a person of routine with post-its, calendars, schedules -- the works! And now? I'm in that three-week vacation phase of yours but for me, it's long-term! As a freelance writer, life is a lot more "free" than I've ever lived in the past and I find myself planning my work around my life rather than the other way around. =) It's so beautiful and definitely something to get used to, but it's my current "normalcy" and I feel that it makes me more flexible! =)

I hope you do find the time to be more creative, Meghan! I know I need more nothing moments in my life, so that I can be too! =)

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